The Official ARRSE Guide to the British Army

Drawn from the wit and wisdom of Britain's biggest and most active military website - www.arrse.co.uk - this is the up-to-the minute, irreverent (but extremely informative) insider's guide to the British Army today.

Guaranteed coarse, scatological and offensive, the Army Rumour Service (www.arrse.co.uk) is the British Army's online meeting place for chat, bullshit, whinging and schimpfing*.Read by everyone in Britain's defence community from the Secretary of State downwards, Arrse is where you will find the inside view from Britain's soldiers.

Now you too can join in the fun with Arrse's very own easily digestible, profusely illustrated, highly absorbent guide to the British Army. Compiled and edited by one of the most extensively passed-over officers in British military history, The Official Arrse Guide is a unique inside view of what the British Army really is and how it really works.

As well as comprehensive information about the regiments and corps, their weapons and equipment, where they live and work, who joins and how they get in, this book tells you how to:

Get that crucial 'ally' look

Make your own wank sock

Mock the RAF

Walt with Giants

Escape the 'Leprechaun of Death'

Major Des Astor is a serving officer with more than 25 years experience in the British Army, Major Des Astor was commissioned into the 2nd Battalion the Loamshire Regiment in 1975. He has served in troublespots across the globe, ranging from Basra to Blackpool and as OC HQ Company of the Loamshires, he oversaw the merger with the Royal Blankshire Regiment and went on to serve as second in command of the newly formed 4th Battalion, the Amalgamees (Blankshire and Loamshire) (V) before their conversion to a TA RLC catering regiment. After a successful tour as SO2 G4 (Pest Control) in HQ MND (SE) at Basra International Airport, Des is now at the MoD, as executive officer for a project seeking to implement operational rat-catching protocols across all three services.

Educated at Badger's Heath College near Oswestry and the Royal Military Academy Sandhurst (where he passed out 247th out of 251 in the Order of Merit), Des now lives on the border between Hampshire and Wiltshire with his wife Fenella and their seven Springer spaniels. They have two grown-up children. In what little spare time he has, Des enjoys bricklaying and canasta.